Title: Outing (part 5)
Fandom: The Faculty / Casey & Zeke
Summery: An article at the schools magazine turns around the world
Disclaimer: The Faculty and the boys are not mine, of course ;)
“You are not gay,” murmured Casey.
And Zeke felt somehow relieved. He hadn't planned to talk about his feelings … certainly it was not the best timing … Casey already was so wrought up and confused … he could get it wrong, feel cheated or betrayed ...
The reason why he had been quiet for so long. They were friends. They were very close. Casey usually didn't open up to others quickly. Neither did Zeke. But he trusted him. Blind. Casey made him think of a future together. In every possible way … as friends, confidants, lovers. He longed for him more than he had ever desired someone else before. But he hadn't been ready to talk about it, to risk what he just had found. Maybe later … in New York … But now all this didn't matter anymore. He had nothing more to lose.
Slowly Zeke shook his head.
“No,” he agreed.
“I'm not gay. I like to flirt with the girls. And I'm not a saint. One night stands. Sometimes a bit more. Not as often as you think though. And I never play a mean trick on them. They know it's just flirting, nothing serious.
Now and then I go to Columbus or Akron. To visit a club … gay clubs.”
He noticed Casey's eyes turning wide with disbelief and smiled slightly.
“I know I'm bi for years. When I was sixteen I spend my holidays on a farm in Indiana. There was this lead-man, only a few years older than me. From the very first moment I noticed his interest in me, even if I was not sure what to think about it. He didn't waste much time. It felt strange first, almost scaring. But we did spend some wild days together and at the end I had to admit that I like it.
Some times later I met Jason. He did show me that it can be more than just mindless fucking in a barn.”
Casey narrowed his eyes.
“You … what is all this about, Zeke? You try to tell my that you are together with … a guy?”
Zeke shook the head.
“Jason is history. We had a nice time together but it didn't break my heart when he finally decided to leave Herrington. It was just about sex, good sex, but beside of that we hadn't much in common.
Don't get it wrong, it was like I wanted it to be. Since I can remember I was used to it to live my life in my way. I didn't like too much nearness. And I've never missed someone to share my darkest secrets. I was like the lonely gunman … always on the run.”
It felt good to notice the slight smile sneaking on Casey's face … maybe for the first time this afternoon.
“But even the lonely gunman sometimes thinks about a place where he can stay. It needed a stupid alien queen for me to realize that. When you stepped into my life. It changed everything.”
Casey swallowed, licked his lips.
“Zeke … “ he murmured.
“Sorry, stupid timing, I know.”
Zeke smiled reassuringly.
“But don't worry, I'm not here to make a drama. I would never step into your way, wherever you decide to go. I would give you a ride to Chicago, to Gideon, when I could be sure that this would make you happy.
I'm worried, though, that you are going to make a great mistake. Don't blame me for that. I'm your friend, I can't close me eyes when you are on the best way to dump your future just because of this shit others dragged you into.
Just one more question, Case. Do you love him?”
Casey huffed surprised and stared at him with wide eyes.
“Simple question, isn't it? What's with love? I know, deep inside you are a romantic guy, you do believe in it.”
Casey blinked, suddenly looking uneasy.
“I … I like him.”
Zeke nodded slowly.
“Probably that's true. But be honest, Casey, do you think this will be enough? You will never regret this step? How will your life be in Chicago … with no one around but him? Maybe he is a nice guy … but he won't change his life for you. You know that, don't you? He's a businessman, he has a rep to lose. He will never belong to you entirely.”
Casey sighed and kept quiet. All his wild determination seemed to fade away. And Zeke knew he had been right from the very beginning. To leave Herrington, go to Chicago head over heals was just the desperate try to escape an almost unbearable situation. Suddenly an idea crossed his mind.
“I know, all this must be pretty confusing,” he said calmly.
“Your feelings for Gideon. This fucking article. The whole town turning into a madhouse. No reason though to run a way in panic. You don't have to go through this alone. You still have friends here. Stan, Stokes. Even your parents … I'm sure...”
“I can't go home now,” Casey interrupted him.
“I just can't! I can't endure it … the way my dad looks at me. My mom crying all day long.”
“I'm guess you are right. A bit distance will be best for you. Until they remember that you are a good son and they love you. What's with your grandparents? Can't you move in with them for a while?”
Casey shook the head.
“They are in Indiana for some weeks to visit my aunt Mary. I can't go anywhere. Chicago is the only option for me.”
“Maybe not. My parents own a cabin at the Red Lake.”
Casey looked at him questioningly and Zeke smiled.
“They are on a cruise to New Zealand and Australia. Won't be back for the next three month. So you could stay there if you want. It's a great place to find back to yourself. To think about what you want to do next.