Hallo, F-List. I'm still here!
It just felt as if everyone was / is still shocked about frolijah_fan_54 and all I could do was to stay quiet for a while. I don't know much more about her than her name, never was close to her, but she seemed to be a wonderful lady who deserves every respect and love you give her. And it felt not right to bother you with fandom stuff for a while ... not to mention this story with it's funny note.
You don't need to read it when you are not in the mood ... but if you do, I hope you will like it. I don't know if anyone can still remember this pic I posted ages ago for addie71's birthday.
I always wanted to write the story behind it and finally I managed to do it.
"I'm so fucked!"
Casey threw his camera-bag carelessly into the grass beside the picknick-table and dropped down onto the wooden bank beside Stokely. His best friend looked up from her book.
"Huh? What's wrong? Brown didn't like your last photo series? You got a B+?”
Casey groaned deeply.
"No, he thinks it's brilliant, as ever. And he's sure even his next challenge is easy to manage for me. I'm fucked."
Stokely chuckled. It was not the first time that he had doubts about the quality of his work though it was unthinkable that he could disappoint his teacher. Mr. Brown acted as if Casey already was a star photographer. And, yes, he was a geek when it came to photography, a genius behind his camera. As unusual as Mr. Brown's tasks could get Casey always got best notes. And at the end of this year he would get not only a straight A but a recommendation from his teacher too which would bring him right into every Art College he wanted.
"What is it this time," she asked curious.
She was sure that she did get it wrong. No teacher from a Highschool in Ohio, not even if he was a bit eccentric like Mr. Brown, would dare to ask his students to take pornographic pictures. No way!
Casey pulled the face.
"Porn! Mr. Brown says it's the ultimate challenge for this year. Erotic pics. A whole photo-series. Holy shit. I can't do that!"
Stokely couldn't hold back a grin.
"Fine. Are you ready for a shooting?"
"Do I look like an erotic queen?"
Casey's eyes sparkled annoyed.
"This is not funny, Stokes, I'm desperate. And I'm not gonna ask Del, forget it. Half of the course will do this anyway."
"Oh yeah, and how much she will enjoy this. What's about Zeke?"
"Zeke? What is about Zeke? He's skipped biology again, he actually should a be a bit more present at school if he wants to graduate this year."
"Don't worry about him, he's smarter than most of the others, you know that."
"Aaaaand ... he's sexy as hell. Ask him!"
Casey rolled with his eyes.
"What? I bet an erotic photo-shoot with him will make you feel like in heaven."
Casey turned beet red in an instant. He often took pics of all his friends and Zeke had always been one of his favorite objects. He was very photogenic. Under other cirumstances he would probably had asked him, but erotic pics ... Annoyed he glared at Stokes. Sometimes he couldn't understand why he had entrusted her with his biggest secret. No one else knew about his gayness ... and his hopeless crush for Zeke.
"Sure, that's a brilliant idea. I will go and ask Zeke Tyler if he wants to strip for me. What do you think he will say?"
"How much do you pay?"
His head jerked around ... and there he was. The guy of their conversation. Good looking as ever, with this compelling smile on his lips, his eyes sparkling amused. Casey wished the earth would open and swallow him up.
"Zeke," he stuttered.
"This is ... it's not ... just ... school project ... I need to ..."
"Mr. Brown wants him to make erotic photos for his next project," Stokely explained, ignoring Casey's killing glances.
"And he's almost desperate enough to ask Delilah."
"Really? So you want to see this bitch stripping for you?"
"Yes. ... Ähm ... No, of course not!"
This was the most painful situation he had ever been in. He hated Mr. Brown and his stupid projects, Stokes, who had brought this idea up, Zeke and his wide grin.
"No one will strip for me, geez. I will go to Mr. Brown tomorrow and tell him that he can do this bullshit all by himself. I'm gonna quit the photo course!"
"And risk you scholar ship for College? C'mon Casey, don't be stupid."
"Hey, I didn't say 'no', did I?"
"I can make it without a scholar ship. I will look for a job over summer. And ..."
Only then he realized Zeke's words and gasped.
"What do you mean?"
"Sounds like fun. I guess I'm willing to give it a try."
Casey's mind was only a confused mess. This was a joke, wasn't it? Zeke would never ... he wanted … Oh God. Just the thought of Zeke getting naked in front of him made his knees going weak.
"Breath, Casey! No need to freak out.”
Zeke chuckled amused ... as if he could look right into his head.
"The clothes will stay on."
"Yes, of course."
Casey knew he turned even more red ... as if this was possible.
"I ... I would never think, you will ..."
"I don't need to strip to look sexy, you know. Even my smile is more erotic than Delilah's tits."
Stokely laughed out loud and all Casey could do was wondering how he had gotten into all this.
"So, tomorrow afternoon, three o'clock, at my house. This okay for you?"
He nodded, feeling numb.
He had been at Zeke's house before. Since MaryBeth, when they all had become friends, Zeke liked to have them over for long movie weekends. It was always a great fun. Especially for Casey. He had been a loner much too long. No one Zeke would invite to his parties. Now he was able to look behind the scenes. It was different than he had expected, the house was tidy and clean, no drugs and booze and porn vids were lying around and … the biggest surprise … Zeke could cook like a god. Casey couldn't get enough from his Californian Quesadillas.
Today it was different. He would be alone with Zeke, no Stokes, no Stan, no others around. No movies or video games. No Tortillas or Sandwiches. He was still not sure what would happen. When it came to his photography he usually felt confident, he knew what he wanted and what he was doing. But when he entered Zeke's house today, weighted down with his camera, some objectives and as much films as he had been able to afford with his small pocket money, his heart was up to his mouth.
“Hey,” Zeke greeted him.
Geez. Casey tried hard not to stare at him. Did he look even better than usual, with his plain white T-Shirt and the khaki-gray Jeans? Or was it just his imagination?
“So freaking hot today. Want a coke?”
Zeke eyed him and chuckled slightly.
“Or you can have a beer if you want. It looks like you could need one to relax. Heineken, the best you can get. I always have a few bottles in the fridge.”
“No thanks, I don't drink, you know that.”
“I know, you are the good boy,” Zeke teased him.
“But, c'mon, Case, one beer can't hurt. I won't tell anyone, promised. Whatever will happen today, no one will ever get to know.”
Great. The pictures crossing his mind in an instant were not very helpful. He avoided to look at Zeke and busied himself with his camera. Zeke left him alone to get a beer for himself and a coke for Casey. When he was back he dropped down onto the old, comfy couch, put his arms behind his head and stretched out his legs. Casey risked another look. Yes, it was true, if he would be able to take a least a few pics, he would beat out all the other students from his art course. This was erotic in its purest form.
“So, what do want me to do?”
He knew, if he didn't want to look like the idiot he felt like it was about time to turn around and grab his camera.
“C'mon, Casey-boy, don't by shy. You are the Maestro of photography. Just tell me what to do and I will follow you where ever you want me to go.”
Casey blinked, not knowing where to start.
“That's so stupid,” he murmured
“What the hell am I doing here?”
“Best pics ever.”
Zeke chuckled slightly but not mocking at all.
“Don't tell me that you can't do this. Take your camera. Look at me ...”
Casey obeyed and laughed out loud. The face Zeke pulled was priceless, he rolled with his eyes, stuck out his tongue. This was everything but erotic but Casey pressed the shutter button anyway.
And again. And again. Finally Zeke stopped and smiled wide. Klick again.
“Fine, you're starting to warm up. So, let's go to the serious stuff now. What do you think about some pics with the good old lady?”
Casey looked at him puzzled.
“Bring a good looking guy together with a cool car and you will catch everyone's interest within a split of a second. The girls will look at the guy. The guys will look at the car. It's so easy to manipulate people.”
Casey laughed but he had to admit that Zeke might be right. The GTO was hot, Zeke sitting in the GTO ...
“Good idea. And can you put your sun-glasses on? This looks so … smart.”
Together they went outside to the car. From this moment on everything was easy. Casey did remember a lot of situations where he barely had been able to take his eyes from Zeke. No matter if he was absorbed in thoughts or laughing his head off, if he wore a plain tee or a colorful hawaiian shirt, he was always the Zeke, someone special, who got attention just for being himself. Not like Delilah who always put a show on. Zeke was just Zeke, the sexiest being Casey could imagine.
He kept his promise, followed Casey's instructions without complaining. Changed clothes countless times, denims, shorts, shirts, even put on this stupid hat, Casey secretly liked so much, despite the suffocating heat outside. Different locations, the GTO was followed by the garden, the garage, the house. The kitchen, the living room … Time flew by like nothing.
Finally they ended up at Zeke's room. He dropped down onto his bed with a soda in his hands. It started to dawn outside. But Casey was not willing to let this afternoon coming to an end. He still had one film left. Oh, there already were more than enough good pics for the photo-series, no girl would be able to look at them without getting her mouth watered. But most of the pics he would keep just for himself. Never before, never again it would be like this afternoon when Zeke had put on his seducing smile for him alone. Just for the pics, of course …
He was still searching through Zeke's closet when he discovered the suit. A dark blue one, with a steel blue shirt and a matching tie. Casey could only stare at it. He barely dared to picture Zeke in this suit, it was breathtaking. But he wanted it … he would do everything to see him wearing it … to take some pictures … jerk off material, better than all the porn magazines Zeke sold out of his trunk at school … Casey coughed slightly when he felt his dick harden … not the right place to think about this ...
Zeke looked up and shook his head when he noticed the suit in Casey's hands.
“No way! My mom tried to force me into this thing last summer for my grandfathers 80th birthday. Big family reunion, you know. I showed up in tattered cut offs and a sleeveless shirt, to show off a faked tattoo.”
“Guess this was the last time I was invited.”
As always when Zeke talked about his family Casey felt a bit uneasy. He couldn't imagine how it was to grow up like Zeke did. Rich parents who gave a shit about their only child, who left him alone when he was barely old enough to take care of himself. No wonder that Zeke didn't give much about family.
“Sorry,” he murmured and turned away, trying to fight his changed mood. It was stupid to be disappointed, after all Zeke had done for him this afternoon. But he couldn't help it.
Zeke watched him putting his stuff together, finally he smirked and got up.
“Fine,” he murmured and reached for the suit.
“I just hope it's worth it and this shit will bring you right into the best art school you can imagine.”
Casey felt like in heaven. No, these pics would bring him no where. Because he would never share them with anyone. Only a few days ago the bare assumption that Zeke was willing to strip for him had almost driven him over the edge. Now he realized how wrong he had been. Nothing could be as hot as Zeke looked in this suit.
Later he couldn't say how he had been able to keep the camera steady, to put his finger onto the shutter bottom again and again. Klick. And klick. And … confused Casey looked up and noticed that he had already taken twenty-five pics … and no film roll left ... He huffed slightly and put the camera aside. Welcome back on earth, he thought and turned to Zeke who was watching him slightly amused. For a moment Casey got the feeling that he could read his mind all too well.
“I guess that was it,” he said quickly to smooth over the awkwardness.
“Can't thank you enough, Zeke. I really don't know what I would have done without you.”
Zeke pulled down the tie, opened the first buttons of the shirt. Casey regretted instantly that there was no film left.
Then he grabbed for a cigarette and lent back against the window bench. Smoking he watched Casey putting away all his camera stuff, the objectives, the …
“What do you think about a little reward in return for my service?”
Casey looked up and smiled.
“Next month, after my birthday, I will invite you to Joey's for a pizza. I'm sure I will get some fun money from my grandma.”
“Keep you money, Case. You know, every month I get a check from my parents I barely touch. And I can make more money every day at school as you get pocket money in a month.”
“So, what do you want?”
Silence for a moment. Eye contact. Casey already started to feel uncomfortable under Zeke's intense look.
His world stopped turning around. It felt as if he was paling and blushing at the same time. He grabbed for hold at the desk and stared at Zeke. His warm smile, his dark eyes … he was not serious, was he? Zeke liked to tease others …
“What,” he tried to make a joke.
“The girls at school starts to get sick of you?”
“I give a shit about them.”
“You give a shit about me. I'm a guy!”
Zeke chuckled slightly and suddenly he was standing close to Casey, much too close. He didn't dare to move when he felt his thumb caressing his cheek. His eyes, cinnamon brown with some sparkles of gold, the long lashes, his warm breath. Casey tried desperately to keep a clear head …
How often had he dreamed about kissing Zeke … and more … but these had been just stupid dreams. Zeke was the straightest guy he knew … he was flirting with the girls, not with him, Casey. Not to mention that he would never ask him for a kiss … that was just not true … maybe he was dreaming again … maybe he would wake up soon enough and realize that this whole afternoon just had been a dream … better stop dreaming, Casey … suddenly he desperately wanted to wake up, he wanted to dump all the pics he had already taken from Zeke into the next bin and he would stop thinking about him in this way … they were friends … friends … this was a lot and he would not destroy everything with his hopeless crush ...
“A guy who wants to kiss other guys,” he could hear Zeke's voice like through a haze.
A fleetingly lick over his top lip, a slight kiss on the bottom one. Finally their lips met. It was so different from all Casey had ever pictured. A soft, careful kiss, the lips warm, the tongue teasing. For a second he stood paralyzed, couldn't do much more then to give in, to feel Zeke kissing him. Impossible to say if it lasted one minute or three or an eternity before he regained his composure. With all his remaining energy he pushed Zeke away.
“What the fuck,” he yelled breathless.
“What's wrong with you, Zeke?”
Panic was rushing through him, all he wanted was to run. For a split of a moment he could think a bit clearer, he grabbed for his camera bag and off he was. Jumped onto his old bike and sprinted away as if he was about to win the Tour de France. His heart was pounding wild against his rips. Zeke Tyler had kissed him …
Zeke dropped down onto his bed, still a bit uneasy about what had happened. The beer and the cigarettes untouched on the floor beside him. He wanted it to last, the sweet, fruity taste in his mouth, the bubblegum Casey was chewing all the time. So cute, almost innocent. Probably his first kiss. He hadn't intended to kiss him. To throw him off out of the blue. But how could he not take advantage out of this situation?
The way Casey had acted this afternoon, the way he looked at him with these great, blue eyes, his slight blushing, his shy giggling. All the pics he had taken, much more than necessary for a schools project.
No, he didn't read all this wrong. Casey wanted him. As much as he wanted Casey. Since MaryBeth, since he'd aimed this fucking gun at him, determined to safe them all, no matter the cost. Even today he sometimes wondered if Casey would have been able to pull the trigger, to kill him. Since then he couldn't get him out of his head. All the girls he kissed could give him just a shallow relief. It didn't mean anything.
He had never been good when it came to deeper feelings, he could flirt, he could tease … but he had never told anyone: I love you. Too afraid that he might get hurt again. Maybe one day Casey could be the one … he was different than anyone else he knew.
His eyes searched for the desk again and he smiled. One lonely film roll, the last one. The suit-pics. Left behind when Casey did run away in panic. His guarantee that he would come back. Zeke knew him well enough. No way that he would give up these pics.